favourite characters > sterling archer, archer

wolfmance:

Lana! Lana! Oh my god, you’ve gotta help me!

usbnotconnected:

Cyril: Why are you so scared of crocodiles?
Archer: Gee, I don’t know, Cyril. Maybe deep down I’m afraid of any apex predator that lived through the K-T extinction. Physically unchanged for a hundred million years, because it’s the perfect killing machine. A half ton of cold-blooded fury, the bite force of 20,000 Newtons, and stomach acid so strong it can dissolve bones and hoofs. -    

usbnotconnected:

Cyril: Why are you so scared of crocodiles?

Archer: Gee, I don’t know, Cyril. Maybe deep down I’m afraid of any apex predator that lived through the K-T extinction. Physically unchanged for a hundred million years, because it’s the perfect killing machine. A half ton of cold-blooded fury, the bite force of 20,000 Newtons, and stomach acid so strong it can dissolve bones and hoofs. -    

Who’s gonna do snappy dialogue with me, underscored by sexual attraction?